APA- San Francisco 2009

More of an abridged, unprioritized conference. As want to study for boards, spend time with C+H+S, and try to enjoy the city.
Flew in on Sat 5/16/09 on SFO in the afternoon. Spent time in Foster City. Fairly relaxing. A lot of movies. S wasn't feeling too well, but got to see her perk up towards the end of w/e.

Now in SF which is cold and breezy. I feel isolated, a bit dorky (self conscious and invisible at the same time). Fight with @ last night about him not coming out to CA, him wanting to prioritize his things. Confirmed by another brief phone conversation this morning. Just feels stupid. And I feel like containing it like I did writing during conversations my conversations with tm. Now I want to time-limit them.
So that has been making me feel kinda crappy. Maybe accented by being with C's family over the w/e. And still not feeling as if I'm on track yet. And just traveling around on my own. Fine, but not really what I want. So the return to monologues and "reflection".

I think there's a bird trapped in the building. But chirping. Oh, I see it. It doesn't look too unhappy though.

Okie, back to "work."

I've been to
Mon 5/18/09
9-10:30am. (came in near 10a) school mental health. still think it's something that I want to get involved in. Don't know how "good" i was at TU, but would like to continue work in that vein.

11-12:30p. Elyn Saks. lawyer and academician with chronic severe mental illness (szp; maybe some mood component). her book _the center will not hold_ came out in 2007 and some resident said they had to read it during or before their inpatient months. she had a strong social network though which I painfully do not have. and her work which she valued. she went through psychoanalysis, and had some training. and married a USC librarian (she's at USC now). some policy work in the use of mechanical restraints, force in general.

now on break until 2pm.
feel better enough to start studying again.